Many of my comments and much of the comments back to me in the previous post related to 'the big bad wolf'. Not too much was said about 'the perfect little angel' or 'red riding hood' or 'the perfectly innocent young lass' - call her what you will.
Let's get real. Some perfect little angels are hugely attracted to big, bad wolves. But, to simply walk into the lion's den and announce, "Hi there! I know you're dangerous but I like danger and I would like to play with you. How about it?" isn't the way it works. For one thing, that's a bit too easy for the big, bad wolf. Big, bad wolfs like to hunt and find their own prey, not have it wander into their lair. Where's the challenge or fun in that?
So, the wolf is out there in the big, wide world and as wolves do, he keeps an eye out for anything interesting to eat. Something take his fancy. She's won't be easy to catch but that's half the fun.
At first, she acts likes she doesn't want to get caught, although he can see that she does want to be caught and she's aware that she is more than mildly interested in the game. Now, wolves know what to do in these situations and perfect little angels also know that you don't just lie down and roll over. The game has begun.
Fast forward to the time when she has agreed to come along with him. She's excited but concerned. Just how bad is this particular big, bad wolf, she wonders?? He can't show her. Not yet. Maybe, he can't ever show her the vast spaces of atrocious thoughts in his mind; the way he'd like to peel off those clothes and defile her; bind her up and torture her. Ooooooh no! He needs to take this slow.
He's charming. He really is a babe; wining and dining her, complimenting and attentive. He heaps copious amounts of attention on her (perfect little angels adore that and he is using it to full effect) and she basks in the arms of someone who is so inordinately special. What a lucky thing it was that she kept her cool long enough to get to know him, she ponders, as he whispers sweet nothing into her ears.
Fast forward again to a time when the wolf can hold in his voracious appetite no longer. He tells her finally all the nasty things he want to do to her. He's working on the inkling that she is ready to hear this about him...and about herself....
because...
actually,
she
wants
those
nasty things
done
to her
too.
Turns out the perfect little angel actually has a hearty appetite of her own but to hold onto her status of the perfect, little angel he needed to pounce on her. He is the big, bad wolf. That's a given. But, the perfect, little angel will always have her halo on straight because the big, bad wolf did it to her.
Hunh.
So how does the wolf choose the girl? Surely she must let out some signs; what would they be? He has to be very careful - there are laws such as rape, common assault, assault with intent to harm. In many countries there is a sex offenders register; he wants to be sure the girl wants to play along, because finding out he has it wrong in mid-pounce could land him the wrong side of the law for many years. The wolf is smart and will protect his own interests; he knows the meaning of Safe, Sane and Consensual.
ReplyDeleteSurely then, the little angel can't be a perfect little angel, because despite the fact that he wants to do it to her, she must give clear, informed consent to each move and that means letting that halo slip.
Vesta,
ReplyDeleteI think for me I did not comment or think of the "perfect little angel" because quite frankly I do not believe such a person exists. I suspected she was a complete person with sexual desires who perhaps simply had not met someone who would enjoy what she enjoys. As for the "big, bad, wolf" his sexual predilections, his sadistic tendencies and desires (in my mind) are not bizarre or intrusive or even criminal therefore I was not concerned about those; however, his narcissistic and potentially borderline abusive behaviours and expectations were what caught my attention.
Finding the right person to help bring out the devil in us all is exciting and hopefully the two characters come together and discover just that.
~a
I agree a lot with goodgirl's comment. It does take the right person to help the perfect little angel become come out of her shell and understand and accept darker parts of herself.
ReplyDeleteInteresting again.
ReplyDeleteMany perfect little angels don't know what it is they want. They know they want something else, something different, something they have not experienced. Even more perfect little angels have an inkling of what they want and shy away from it, poor little loves.
The wolf understands very well that the relationship between wolf and prey is symbiotic. What a false existence the wolf would lead if there was no prey to hunt and just how unfulfilled would the little angel be if she remained unhunted? One requires the other.
A wolf by its very nature reads people and situations very well. It ignores so many as inedible and yet sometimes something will attract his interest. A look, a movement, gesture, a phrase perhaps or just a subtle aura. Just enough to make the wolf think, hmmm, let's explore this just a little bit further.
Hunting is a slow and subtle process and that is what makes it so delicious. That moment when wolf and prey are at last in clear sight of one another. A time for each to savour, one in satisfaction, the other in fearful excited anticipation.
As for the angel remaining angelic, well that really is the case. She wants those dreadful things he does to her, in fact she will beg so nicely to obtain them, but the responsibility is his. He has overpowered her, he has shown her the path. He has made her into what she now is, and being a good girl she is properly grateful.
Just my thoughts obviously.
rollymo: What I had in mind was those stories that suggest there is another side to the story - 'The True Story of the Three Little Pigs' or the 'True Story of Little Red Riding Hood'. These stories suggest that characters such as the big, bad wolf have been 'taking the rap' for other characters.
ReplyDeleteSo, maybe the 'innocent character' had a part to play in her own demise..?
good girl: Yes. It's a tricky thing really. We give our consent to play with us and by virtue of that play we can realistically expect some pretty arrogant behavior. We've agreed to be fed off and there's intrinsic egocentricity in that occurrence. But, if our sensibilities are affronted or if we feel confronted in some way we have complaints. All players walk a fine line. The wolf, by definition, is going to be dangerous. It's what makes the wolf so darn attractive to us, I think. The wolf has a tough job coz he remains wolf-like and yet we ask that he be civilized and polite as well. If the wolf is going to cause distress to the sweet l'il girl it is probably that sometimes he can be sweet and sometimes he can be cruel and sometimes the little girl has expectations he should be one thing when he feels like being another.
In spite of the fact that the little girl has openly welcomed the wolf's play, if she gets cross then she can forget about her consent to play with the wolf and feel it is all his fault that the wolf acted like...well...like a wolf. It may be that the little girl needs the wolf to explore other aspects of her personality and hence, she's not so innocent and demure after all.
dancingbarez: I couldn't agree with you and goodgirl more about that. There may only be one shot at that and you can't let it go.
The point I was trying to make was that it is all too easy for the little girl (the submissive) to take umbrage at how the wolf (the Dominant) acts but maybe he's only behaving as wolves do and when she experiences that in all its glory and difficulty, she reverts back to her mode of innocence and cries foul at his wolfly nature.
I'm just suggesting that wolves may get all the blame a little unjustly.
Nice picture by the way, I think I look remarkably fine!
ReplyDeleteAnon: Naturally, I chose one of your better photographs and I think this one is most handsome.
ReplyDeleteIn my earlier days, I wouldn't have written this web journal and I wouldn't have admitted what I wanted. I *knew* what I wanted but I kept my distance from wolves. So, yes, more girls (than me) are like this, I feel sure.
I completely agree that the process is subtle, slow and most sustaining.
I like your determination that she remains angelic and as well, of course, grateful. You may have found that sometimes the girl can revert for periods of time, aghast at what she has become; dismayed by her own appetites...possibly even blaming him for the transformation?? I think that can happen and it's important for him not to take that personally. It's simply a stage in the rather intense process. She'll come round to accepting her own nature in good time.