I am at the beginning of research for a story. There are the technical aspects of a girl being dominated by a man that I don't really have at my fingertips. I've got a general idea, of course, of what sort of deeds a man can come up with to make a girl feel helpless but I need very specific details for the story. I have to think about just how he ties her body and to what. As well, I need to understand how his fetishes drive him to want to do all sorts of unusual things to her.
I happened to come across an article (http://english.pravda.ru/society/sex/30-10-2006/85273-fetish-0/) which stated that Johnny Depp had disclosed that he had a thing for angora sweaters and that when he broke up with a girl at an earlier stage in his life he was broken-hearted. However, he really missed her angora sweaters more than he missed the girl.
Might this be the definition of a fetish, then; that you are in love with the object and not so much with the girl wearing the object, even if you are in a relationship with her?
I can understand fetishes, but only to some extent. I don't have any fetishes of my own (that I am aware of) and so I can't entirely get into the mind of a fetishist. I have some idea. I know that one son likes to have his blankie in bed with him at night; that he has always liked to run his hand across silk and I imagine he'll very much enjoy his girl's lingerie when he gets older. And, I have, of course, communicated with a fetishist; a man who loves to see a woman with very long, acrylic fingernails.
I'm aware that some fetishists probably go over the top; needing to do things that are considered gross to most people, but these garden variety fetishes, I see no harm in them at all and I can't understand why fetishists are so alarmed about having these desires. So, you love black shiny boots and like to watch women in black shiny boots with high heels walk by. So what? You aren't committing any crime, are you?
I am having trouble getting into the mindset of a person who worries so much about these things. I read in the article that if you love watching another woman other than your wife or girlfriend in a nurse's uniform more than you love watching your naked wife who won't wear a nurse's uniform for you, that could be a problem. I see that. If you really, really need to be with a woman in a nurse's uniform and that is affecting your marriage, this could be a dilemma. But , maybe it's a problem of the marriage more than the fetish itself. Is it so much to ask that she get into a nurse's uniform every so often for you?
I do get that a fetish could cause big problems if not kept under control. But, to deny the fetishist his object of desire/love can't be healthy. It's a bit like a person with an eating disorder. You don't deny them food. You just teach them how to think about food and how to go about eating daily in a healthy way. A fetishist does need to be with his object of desire, surely, but with his object of desire in moderation.
I freely admit I just don't understand it. If anyone can illuminate me, that would be fantastic.
I happened to come across an article (http://english.pravda.ru/society/sex/30-10-2006/85273-fetish-0/) which stated that Johnny Depp had disclosed that he had a thing for angora sweaters and that when he broke up with a girl at an earlier stage in his life he was broken-hearted. However, he really missed her angora sweaters more than he missed the girl.
Might this be the definition of a fetish, then; that you are in love with the object and not so much with the girl wearing the object, even if you are in a relationship with her?
I can understand fetishes, but only to some extent. I don't have any fetishes of my own (that I am aware of) and so I can't entirely get into the mind of a fetishist. I have some idea. I know that one son likes to have his blankie in bed with him at night; that he has always liked to run his hand across silk and I imagine he'll very much enjoy his girl's lingerie when he gets older. And, I have, of course, communicated with a fetishist; a man who loves to see a woman with very long, acrylic fingernails.
I'm aware that some fetishists probably go over the top; needing to do things that are considered gross to most people, but these garden variety fetishes, I see no harm in them at all and I can't understand why fetishists are so alarmed about having these desires. So, you love black shiny boots and like to watch women in black shiny boots with high heels walk by. So what? You aren't committing any crime, are you?
I am having trouble getting into the mindset of a person who worries so much about these things. I read in the article that if you love watching another woman other than your wife or girlfriend in a nurse's uniform more than you love watching your naked wife who won't wear a nurse's uniform for you, that could be a problem. I see that. If you really, really need to be with a woman in a nurse's uniform and that is affecting your marriage, this could be a dilemma. But , maybe it's a problem of the marriage more than the fetish itself. Is it so much to ask that she get into a nurse's uniform every so often for you?
I do get that a fetish could cause big problems if not kept under control. But, to deny the fetishist his object of desire/love can't be healthy. It's a bit like a person with an eating disorder. You don't deny them food. You just teach them how to think about food and how to go about eating daily in a healthy way. A fetishist does need to be with his object of desire, surely, but with his object of desire in moderation.
I freely admit I just don't understand it. If anyone can illuminate me, that would be fantastic.
I'm extremely impressed with your writing skills and also with the layout on your blog. Is this a paid theme or did you modify it yourself? Anyway keep up the excellent quality writing, it's rare to see a great blog like this one these days.
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If you would be interested to read it, I would be happy to share first hand my thoughts and experiences on my fetish, which has been a deeply integral part of my persona and sexuality for the past 35 years and I can't imagine being without. Would you prefer a reply here or a missve via email? Due to the character limit on blog replies a response here might be brief, but I am happy to share anything I write with the readership here, no matter how it gets over to you.
ReplyDeleteAnon: Although I do aim for an ego-less state, the facts are that I do very much enjoy praise, so many thanks for your generous remarks. I just set up the account in Blogger; not a paid theme.
ReplyDeleterollymo: I would be most grateful for the time and effort you will no doubt most generously take to construct your thoughts via email. My sincere thanks.