I can feel the sexuality oozing out of every pore of my
skin. My psyche has tapped into the little girl I once was, waiting for life to
happen; waiting for some man to claim me; waiting for adventures that I could
only understand on some very visceral level; waiting for my life to begin; for
the real me to come to the surface and breathe.
How do I feel? Ravenous. I am frightened and seduced by The
Dark Lord of my imagination. I crave to do his bidding; I lust to be directed
to do lascivious things; to go down, down, down to the darkest recesses of his
(and my) mind.
To smell the flowers in my garden, to sit and watch the wind
throw about the pollen is enchanting but at the same time as I marvel at nature
and thrive on beauty I seek degradation; wallow in lust; crave direction and
endure correction; give myself up and with my utmost approval seek to be taken
down.
This is the doll; my sexuality; my life blood; my oxygen; my
sanctity and my saving grace. This is me.
And you are beautiful.
ReplyDeletexx
~a
Some say The Truth hurts, but not from where I'm standing right now.
ReplyDeleteYou're a phoenix: your demise is your salvation.
Oh that is just lovely! What an energizing post. I know this is likely an odd word to use, but brave is what comes to mind. TO except this part of yourself so wonderfully well is brave.
ReplyDeleteWhat a perfectly worded post!
ReplyDeleteYou are brave as Serenity said. Thanks for writing this out.
goodgirl: You are a very good friend!
ReplyDeleteRollymo: Yes, my demise is indeed my salvation. Very kind words; thank you for your support.
Serenity: Thank you, most sincerely. For a long time, it felt "brave" to pursue this because there *were* hiccups and days when it all seemed too much trouble and strife, but now it feels...right.
Nancy: My thanks to you. I actually wrote this post as free-flowing thought. I was deep within my psyche for a few minutes in the middle of the day and I wanted to see if I could put words to how I felt. The post is what came out and I wrote it, read it over quickly for any glaring mistakes and hit 'publish'. I see that I wrote "I seek degradation". Wow! Now, where did that come from!!?? My psyche is indeed brave! LOL