Thursday, October 31, 2013

Balancing the needs of kink

Kink doesn't lose any traction over time. It only gets stronger and more demanding.`These desires can overwhelm the mind, take up more and more time until there can come a moment when one registers that perhaps one is out of balance; perhaps one should try hard to think about something else.

When in the midst of one's kink, either satiated, or with a lustful appetite for more expression of the kink, there's a sense that one probably should leave the table for one's own health. Yet, there is more meat on the bone, more trifle, Camembert cheese; more chocolates in the box. And, these banquets don't happen every day. Why not a little more?

It can happen to one person or both; that moment when one simply has to stop ingesting; simply has to stop partaking of the delicious treats. That's not a bad thing. It's an acknowledgement to oneself to go a little slower perhaps; to acknowledge that we can be in the grip at times of our own lust.

I don't advocate and am too far into these processes to ever again STOP what I know does me a heap of good. Kink, for me, doesn't work like that. My needs are my needs and they don't go away for very good reasons. It's not some game for me but rather a real need for my body to experience what it does on a daily basis. It's a treatment of sorts and if you take away the treatments I go down hill very fast.

However, it's no bad thing to redistribute daily life every so often. It's been cold and dull here for far too long but the sun has begun to make an appearance late in the day these evenings and it prompts me to get out and about more; to spread my creativity across various pursuits as a form of personal expression; to interact with creative sorts on various non digital platforms and to enjoy my life in every way.

I don't mean that I should suddenly make a bunch of decisions to counteract my desire to make no decisions at all. That would not work. I need my 'bimbo' time. I adore it too much. What I mean is that the longing for the bimbo state can have me going too slow; leave me in a rather catatonic state where the longing for it becomes too much. The longing can hurt me and be counter-productive and if there's no real solution presenting itself in my life right now as to consistency of that experience, then there comes a time when I need to turn the longing off, for my own sake.

The kink won't, and need not go away. It's here to stay. I have no power to alter this nor do I wish to do so. Yet, there is so much of life to explore and it's time I did just a little more of that. It's all about balance - simply redistributing the thoughts patterns so that they are more in line with what works ideally. The formula for that is within the mind of each kinkster, according to the limitations and precinct of one's life as led with other people. Following one's intuition is really the only way to reconstruct balance.

2 comments:

  1. From personal experience, I can attest that kink never goes away. But nor does the longing, IMHO. I think that not having one's kink met is a little like being homesick. We get by in our present circumstances but long for somewhere to feel at home; somewhere that our soul can rest. The best we can do is distract ourselves from our craving, which I guess is what you're angling at, and find some enjoyment that occupies us enough that we temporarily stop hearing it call to us.

    Others who don't share our predicament might see this as a form of addiction that needs a cure. But I never, ever want to be cured. I love my kink and cherish it. It's at the heart of who I am. I'm sure you feel the same.

    I wish you well in finding your distraction.

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  2. rollymo: Exactly so. My kink won't ever go away. Nor, do I want it to. It would be like killing off myself. But, I do feel I need a rest from the longing. I was rather hoping that distracting myself somewhat might provide me with some relief, yes. There's a lot more to say here - that goes along the lines of when one partner, say, has more libido than another. I've an interesting article on that that ranges from not taking the inaction of the other personally to accepting that monogamy may not be the right vehicle for the two of you, but I haven't sorted through my feelings about the article to say any more here.

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