For some dominants there is simply no negotiation. They determine what they want the submissive to achieve and there is no alternative but to bunker down and accept the situation. Of course, these situations are rarely easy; designed with struggle in mind; never achieved without intense challenge and commitment.
The dominant is inclined to cajole; a version of the carrot and stick approach; plenty of applause when there is improvement and progress but expressed disappointment and upset when the challenge is not embraced and accepted; when there is a lack of success.
The complacent submissive needs a correction. Complacency is not acceptable; most of all because the dominant can feel that he has failed the submissive in guiding her towards the success of the situation. No dominant wants to feel that sense of failure - if she fails then so does he - and hence drastic measures must finally be undertaken, because failure is just not on.
Realistically, day by day, people say, "I'm sorry. I just couldn't do it" and the other says, "That's okay. I know you tried." But, this is not the power exchange I know. What I know is that the dominant will simply go to more extreme measures to achieve satisfactory outcomes. The goal has been orchestrated and determined and not without careful thought; that's that.
The submissive has few alternatives available to him or her. Once a dominant says the way thing are going to be, in my experience, there's no reprieve. Sure, they'll discuss it somewhat but only to ultimately say that there will be no discussion about this, that the matter has been decided - a version of the argument 'I'm happy to discuss it and then we'll do it my way'.
The submissive isn't happy. She feels that the determination is harsh. She bristles at being corrected. She knows the next period of time is going to be filled with angst, sorrow, anger, frustration; feeling hardly done by; regret; change and transformation. Yet, she recognizes his responsibility to her; the fact that she should have done better; could have done better. He isn't inclined to relent. If she knows anything by now, she knows that. Success will happen.
What she had has been removed for a time; time for her to recommit to his insistence that his will is done; her inner understanding that this is what works for her; his control; his non-negotiating will; that she can do this; that their dynamic is such that she will do this and that there is no alternative but to succeed; not to "fail". The bottom line is this: thy will be done. Seriously, she respects this. She wouldn't want it any other way.
The dominant is inclined to cajole; a version of the carrot and stick approach; plenty of applause when there is improvement and progress but expressed disappointment and upset when the challenge is not embraced and accepted; when there is a lack of success.
The complacent submissive needs a correction. Complacency is not acceptable; most of all because the dominant can feel that he has failed the submissive in guiding her towards the success of the situation. No dominant wants to feel that sense of failure - if she fails then so does he - and hence drastic measures must finally be undertaken, because failure is just not on.
Realistically, day by day, people say, "I'm sorry. I just couldn't do it" and the other says, "That's okay. I know you tried." But, this is not the power exchange I know. What I know is that the dominant will simply go to more extreme measures to achieve satisfactory outcomes. The goal has been orchestrated and determined and not without careful thought; that's that.
The submissive has few alternatives available to him or her. Once a dominant says the way thing are going to be, in my experience, there's no reprieve. Sure, they'll discuss it somewhat but only to ultimately say that there will be no discussion about this, that the matter has been decided - a version of the argument 'I'm happy to discuss it and then we'll do it my way'.
The submissive isn't happy. She feels that the determination is harsh. She bristles at being corrected. She knows the next period of time is going to be filled with angst, sorrow, anger, frustration; feeling hardly done by; regret; change and transformation. Yet, she recognizes his responsibility to her; the fact that she should have done better; could have done better. He isn't inclined to relent. If she knows anything by now, she knows that. Success will happen.
What she had has been removed for a time; time for her to recommit to his insistence that his will is done; her inner understanding that this is what works for her; his control; his non-negotiating will; that she can do this; that their dynamic is such that she will do this and that there is no alternative but to succeed; not to "fail". The bottom line is this: thy will be done. Seriously, she respects this. She wouldn't want it any other way.
