Resistance

 Brett, my friend on death row, wrote in a recent letter that he has been enjoying watching the sun rise and the sunsets; that they are some of the prettiest he has ever seen.

My son, who befriended a mature aged man who was in his Animation Course and finally finished the course after a number of years, made the effort yesterday to attend his graduation, a very special day for him.

My painter, a refugee from Afghanistan who came here on a Humanitarian Visa, noted to me that he had been enjoying my stash of camomile tea.

Volodymyr Zelenskyy noted to David Letterman in an interview that he had been enjoying the mornings; another day in which he had woken up alive.

A guest of Andrew Huberman who visited the Ukraine recently said to him that the people were still making delicious food; prided themselves on doing so.

The guest noted also that while it is thought democracy is at threat in the United States, when one visits the Ukraine, there is the realization that life in the United States is fundamentally stable.

When I am in the enclosed trampoline with my grandsons, that sits in their garden, they want me to bounce them, and jump with them, but my right knee sometimes tells me that it's a bit too much. So I sit in the middle and let them run about me. There's still plenty of movement but I'm not adding to it, or trying to stop it. I'm secure and know that eventually it will stop.

My youngest son, the one who still lives with us, sees that life lived with a worrier, a compulsive person like his Dad, is not easy. He has a quirky sense of humor, as do I.

'Mum, you do good work," he said pointing at me from the far side of the room just before he departed.

'You do good work', I said, pointing back at him.

We both laughed.

In a tough situation, laughter works. Zelenskyy agreed. He still likes to crack jokes.

When Deity died, but I was still unaware of his passing, there was a very still moment for me, complete peace, and somehow, don't ask me how, I knew his spirit was free.

All these little moments. The present moment.

As the world spins around us, chaos, even madness seemingly winning the day, we still have at our disposal the pleasure, and the acceptance of the present moment.

As one of my favourite meditation teachers likes to say, 'Everything that peace touches becomes peaceful.' 

I fulfilled a request by my painter from Afghanistan yesterday to construct a letter to ask about his sisters' application for a humanitarian visa to join him here in Australia. The streets of Tehran are very dangerous and even going onto the streets to buy food puts them at risk of being jailed should they be deemed a protester.

We sat looking out onto a lush garden as we talked of them on the streets of Tehran in possible danger.

It's been a wild, wild ride this year.

As a friend said to me via email just now, if I try to go against the spinning tree, it will throw me off, but if I let it stop of it's own accord, it will. 

Don't resist.

Ah yes, that special phrase of Carl Jung comes to mind, 'What you resist, persists.' 

'It is what it is.' Indeed.

And the most profound of all? Lennon's 'Let it Be'.

Shining a Light

There are times in one's life that seem so easy one takes them for granted. And then come the inevitable difficult times. 

A spiritual leader I follow talks about rehearsing for those difficult times by appreciating what is good; stopping to smell the roses so to speak; like building up a fortress of contentment and ease with the present moment such that it can buttress you against the difficult times that will inevitably come.

Sometimes, difficult or sad things collide with one another creating a labyrinth of difficult issues that seem hard to navigate.

If I try to describe this feeling, it's like things are out of place; like there's confusion in the natural order of things.

Then, it's time to walk; to let the dust settle so to speak; to let the dirt settle in the jar and fall to the bottom of the jar so that the water becomes clear.

Then one sees more clearly.

Yes, a pet will die, maybe earlier than we thought. It's heartbreaking but it's a tender time too; when we savor the moments left; when love is abundant and transparent. Be Here Now.

Relationships may end. Wouldn't it be lovely if we could end those relationships with grace; with civility and a sense of love. All that love. Did it just vanish? So much abundant love, gone up in smoke? Highly unlikely, I say. Something is covering the heart; a denial that seems necessary to do what is being done, but love itself remains, even if hidden from view.

As part of the Compassion Prison Project, which I highly recommend, I exchange letters with a man on death row. I think you might be surprised at how easy it is to do this; two souls writing to one another. That's the way I see it.

Tough love. Does that really work? I am not an advocate. Teaching, showing, modelling, providing opportunities for people to dig deep into their core and be resilient; that's worth doing, absolutely, but without love in the heart, without a sense of a soul touching a soul, I am not sure you are doing any good.

We, as humans, have so much capacity to shine a light in the darkness. I wonder why we let that opportunity go so readily.

Kink

My guided meditations in a group situation have been a huge hit. It's delightful to hear that the group participants enjoy them. I certainly love to give them. It's a very professional situation but it's also a message from the soul dimension. At first, I had  note cards but then I realized that I needed to trust myself - to let it come up from deep within. So far, so good.

This is not a brag session; on the contrary. This is evidence of my theory that when you talk to a healing practitioner of any sort it is important to realize that they aren't some sort of special person who has perfected the business of living. Knowing the 'theory' so to speak is a little different to being able to put what you know into practice every minute of the day.

Another way of putting all this is to say that I have some great days and I have some not so great days when in spite of a lot of knowing about living in the moment, I have no alternative but to notice that it is, quite simply, one of those days.

I can say that my emotions don't spill out at all. I have no impulsiveness that I actually act out. Rather, I am aware of what I call unwanted thoughts running through the mind. There are a couple of ways to deal with this:

- I could notice the thought, register that I am not my thoughts and refuse to interact with the thought.

- I could sit and be with the thoughts, feeling into the emotions that come along with the thoughts until they fall away, which they will do.

- I could go for a walk, which is the strategy I am about to put into action; perhaps otherwise known as distraction.

If I were to interrogate the thought and come up with a rational mind interpretation of the day I might conclude that there is a sort of  'soul loneliness' today; that what I really need (want?) is a sense of deep connection that isn't available to me at the moment, even if I were to reach out. It's the last part of that sentence that probably made it inevitable that I'd feel a bit off today.

It's the kinky part of my being looking for satiation. I know this feeling well. Often I can override it with the joy of living; other times not.

It's a small thing really; so much to be grateful for. I am sure this gratefulness thought will deepen as I feel the wind on my face this afternoon; the lull of being carried along by the train; walking on crowded streets. The feeling will dissipate as all feelings do. I am fully aware it is just a silly repetitive thought that offers me nothing. If only I could pay someone to take it away for good!

I have had so many wonderful moments with this kinky body of mine, but sometimes I do long for the disposition of the vanilla mind. What a bother it is to be ravenous for the kind of food that is so often out of season!