This is an addendum to the last post, 'Just Sit'. It occurred to me, with the distance of a day since I wrote that post, that it could be interpreted by a reader as my suggesting that that's all that is required in all circumstances - to just sit.
Firstly, if you are new to meditation I would suggest you join a meditation class to avoid any pitfalls of thinking that there is some special way to meditate that you aren't doing.
Also, a meditation practice adjusts over time and each person's experience is likely to be unique to them.
As an example, focusing on the breath - breathing in for the count of four, holding for two and breathing out for 4 (or longer) - works well for many people but not all people, who might do better just focusing on the sounds far away, or a mind picture that evokes tranquillity.
And even if the breath is the point of focus for a while, it's unlikely to stay that way for the length of the meditation. When the mind offers some deep and intense revelation to the just sitting person, the breath is unlikely to be the focus.
I think it works well to maintain a sense of curiosity about the experience - wonder - of the workings of the mind in meditation.
I don't understand really why everyone isn't deeply curious about why they do what they do; the things that bother them, trigger them, delight them; bring them up, take them down.
As an example, I can catch myself these days in a 'longing' state. It comes up as needing something - more. But more of what? If I go in search of a piece of chocolate or follow a trail on the Internet to some object that Google thinks I might buy, is that about the chocolate or object? Hardly. Why aren't people interested in what's behind the behavior?
Enough. Enough. It's starting to sound like a rant.
The other concern I had about the 'just sit' post is that it might be construed by a reader as my suggesting that just sitting/meditation/silence was enough in all cases. It isn't. I tried psychological counseling twice and didn't get exactly what I needed but that's me and my life circumstances. It may well work for most others. And, if there are concerns sitting there - something that is denying you a sense of ease in your life - it's worth a try.
On that, I listen to a couple of psychologists chat on their podcast and I can say with confidence that finding a psychologist you like, and who likes you, is the name of the game. So, feel into the experience.If you are not comfortable, try someone else.
I went my own way, largely; read lots, listened to lots and felt into my experience. There were miscues and missteps but I think you could chalk that up to 'life'.
I very much like the idea of Elizabeth Gilbert, the writer. (Eat, Pray, Love; The Signature of All Things) who said that 'interesting' was a word she uses a lot now. So, the only person who fully understood her died. That's interesting. She thought she couldn't live without her but there she was eating a sandwich. Apparently, she could live without her. That's interesting...
In other words, rather than fuss so much about what happens to us on this journey we call 'life' we could note how interesting the twists and turns; how interesting the thoughts and feelings of a meditation sit.
There's so much less angst in that word, don't you think?
From the Eight Awakenings of Great Beings…
ReplyDeleteThe second awakening is to know how much is enough. Even if you already have something, you set a limit for yourself for using it, so you should know how much is enough.
The Buddha said, “Monks, if you want to be free from suffering, you should contemplate knowing how much is enough. By knowing it, you are in the place of enjoyment and peacefulness. If you know how much is enough, you are content even when you sleep on the ground. If you don’t know it, you are discontent even when you are in heaven. You can feel rich even if you are poor. You can feel poor even if you have much wealth. You may be constantly compelled by the fivesense desires and pitied by those who know how much is enough. This is called ‘to know how much is enough.’”
(Sigh)
slipzen: Do you know of Rick Hanson, a psychologist who became very interested in the Buddha and now guides a group meditation followed by a talk on a topic related to Buddhism together with practical tips based on his psychological experience? Wednesday nights out of California starting at 6 pm. You can sign up on his site for free if interested.
ReplyDeleteAnyway Rick has mentioned this concept of more. And I recall a bold friend asking me a few years back, 'How much more love do you need?'
How much more chocolate, wine,figs, love, play, connection?? Greed does require personal intervention.
One benefit of the lockdowns was teaching us that we don't need nearly as much as we thought we did.
I'm still learning to pause, to let a feeling of 'wanting' pass; realizing that it is transitory. It's like a living thing in my body, a hollowness at the back of my throat, wanting a feeling of connection, a bond. And all I can do is breathe into it and wait for the constriction to ease up.
Still, I don't think it's so bad. After all, they invented 'Sanga' for people like us to talk the talk, at the same time as we learn to walk the walk...