I am sitting here in a Japanese machiya reading stories set in Ireland, marvelling at Colm Toibin's ability to write stories that lead the reader to emotions otherwise well hidden from consciousness. As he would say himself, it is a kind of poetry, and I have come to feel that this sort of writing is the most admirable of all. As one of his characters thinks, I agree that I am not at all a person of science but rather that words are what move and excite me - the power of words and what they can do - illicit emotion.
We strive for close connections in our lives and Toibin's writings often speak to our need for our mothers to have wanted us, to enjoy being with us and to approve of us. Yet as he also points out, there is this long stretch of time left for mothers to do their best work in their middle years and beyond. Sometimes, all that came before is preparation for this period of life with more contemplative pleasures.
I sit here most days and tap out a message to the children and once in a while one of them feels duty bound to dash off a response back. You put the time in early and it pays off - they are happy you are happy and let's get back to living life!
It's a funny thing but I feel a great deal of comfort within myself right now in this foreign land, totally comfortable with the notion that I am made up of a mixture of unique characteristics, of ways of moving and completing tasks; of memories and feelings; desires. I am moved deeply by a Zen garden, by a Buddhist chant. I take great pleasure in purifying myself by the washing of my hands outside a Temple.
And yet, when I read Toibin my heart sings in a very special way for it is an Irish heart, this heart. I am sure of this. One day, perhaps not until I am old and alone - but one day - I shall go there and confirm this.
We strive for close connections in our lives and Toibin's writings often speak to our need for our mothers to have wanted us, to enjoy being with us and to approve of us. Yet as he also points out, there is this long stretch of time left for mothers to do their best work in their middle years and beyond. Sometimes, all that came before is preparation for this period of life with more contemplative pleasures.
I sit here most days and tap out a message to the children and once in a while one of them feels duty bound to dash off a response back. You put the time in early and it pays off - they are happy you are happy and let's get back to living life!
It's a funny thing but I feel a great deal of comfort within myself right now in this foreign land, totally comfortable with the notion that I am made up of a mixture of unique characteristics, of ways of moving and completing tasks; of memories and feelings; desires. I am moved deeply by a Zen garden, by a Buddhist chant. I take great pleasure in purifying myself by the washing of my hands outside a Temple.
And yet, when I read Toibin my heart sings in a very special way for it is an Irish heart, this heart. I am sure of this. One day, perhaps not until I am old and alone - but one day - I shall go there and confirm this.
Ireland is a wonderful place Vesta...you will love it if you ever go... not that one is being biased...laughs....it does sound wonderful where you are though
ReplyDeleteblossom
blossom: We talked about it and I think Ireland will be our next destination.
ReplyDeleteJapan was the perfect holiday destination for us. It's an incredible country to visit, full of fascination and so many people who were very kind indeed.